You know you're a NICU Mom when...

I've had the idea for this post for quite a while but didn't want to write it prematurely cuz I might miss something so I've been writing things down as they come to me. I have a pretty good list so I figured I'd go ahead and post. I can always add to it later, right? I said NICU Mom but most of these apply to Dad too, didn't mean to leave him out. I hope some of these make you smile. Here goes:

You know you're a NICU Mom when...

1. Your car drives itself to the hospital, even though you've been discharged.
2. You regularly speak in five syllable words.
3. You greet visitors with hand sanitizer.
4. You get a lump in your throat and tears in your eyes if you see the neonatal ambulance on the road.
5. You say a prayer for whoever's in that neonatal ambulance.
6. You get angry with pregnant ladies who want their baby to come early.
7. The sound of a ding or alarm makes you jump & look for a monitor...even if you're at the mall.
8. You can convert grams to pounds and ounces.
9. Kangaroo becomes a verb, "I kangaroo'd for three hours today."
10. You envy the mom in her third trimester who can't see her feet.
11. After you're home you wonder what your little one's diaper weighs.
12. You want to go back to the hospital to suction little one's nose real good.
13. While talking about your little one someone asks if you're a nurse.
14. You miss your nurses every day.
15. You bawl when the Pampers NICU commercial comes on.
16. You know which bathroom and lactation room at the hospital is the best.
17. You're tempted to take little one's temperature every day...after discharge.
18. You buy the convertible car seat rated for 4lbs and up just in case you need it for the next baby.
19. You have a panic attack when thinking about the next baby.
20. You think an 8lb newborn is ginormous.
21. You know more acronyms than military personnel.
22. You contemplate grocery delivery in winter so you don't have to take little one out during cold & flu season.
23. You're not offended if another parent asks if you or your family's been sick the past 14 days.
24. You can interpret the monitor of someone you're visiting in the hospital...even worse if you silence their alarms.
25. You use familiar objects to explain your child's size/weight.
26. You think doll clothes are huge.
27. Post-NICU your Facebook posts celebrate how many -ologists you've been able to break up with.
28. The hospital's NICU number is still programmed in your phone.
29. You're just as excited to catch up with your doctors and nurses as you are your own family at Thanksgiving.
30. You buy a second freezer in order to store more breastmilk.
31. You pick your wardrobe based on what's easiest to kangaroo in.
32. Breastfeeding in public is nothing, you've been critiqued by so many people before you even left the hospital.
33. You couldn't imagine what it's like to take your newborn home 48hrs after delivery.
34. You wonder how in the world you didn't fall apart while balancing NICU and home life.
35. You use celcius instead of fahrenheit.
36. You can correctly measure suction and feeding tubes.
37. You know it's perfectly normal for newborns to have caffeine.
38. You help other people with directions at the hospital.
39. Your little one's shirts are side-snap or kimono style.
40. You couldn't find one single store that sells preemie diapers in bulk.
41. The travel Kleenex pack in your purse reminds you of your little one's first diapers.
42. You celebrate two birthdays a year - the one that is and the one that should've been.
43. You still bring goodies to the NICU.
44. You know when Prematurity Awareness Month is.
45. You know there aren't any good Homecoming announcements out there.
46. There's no way your little one could sleep more than an arm's length away after discharge.

47. You know more about insurance billing codes & procedures than the person on the other end of the customer service line.
48. Cardio no longer refers to a great workout.
49. Navigating the salad bar with the sneeze shield is easy - try diapering through port holes!